To the woman considering abortion:

I read a letter several days ago on Facebook. It was written by a woman to the baby she was going to abort later in the week. I could hardly finish the letter, I could barely read it through tears. I was a mess, a sobbing mess. Not just because of the decision she was making, but also that there was a "decision" to be made. So, I put it down and prayed for her. I've prayed for her daily since. I don't know if she's real or not, obviously you can't believe everything you read on the Internet. But, even if she's not, there are women just like her....considering abortion, feeling overwhelmed by the call to parenthood and believing the same lies. There were things in the letter that I simply couldn't get out of my mind, lies and fears that I know too many women believe and if only they knew the truth I couldn't help but think they'd make a different decision.

1. The lie: "Next time I see those blue lines I'll be ready." The truth: You won't. Nobody's ever "ready." Well, not nobody, but in most cases we're not ready. Even those of us that get pregnant in the best or most ideal circumstances. Being responsible for another life is a big job. The doubt we have in our ability to do that will inevitably surface at some point. It may be when we first see those blue lines, for some it will be later in the 2nd or 3rd trimester or maybe even a month or so after birth. The lie is that we don't "feel" ready, but the truth is when the Lord calls us to be parents, He will equip us with everything we need to do it. That doesn't mean it will be flawless or easy. Most things that are worth it aren't easy. 

2. The lie: "I don't feel the joy and enchantment a pregnant mother is supposed to feel." The truth: Not all mothers feel joyful right away. And this is SO very normal. I wish more women knew it. Our feelings are a tricky thing. And sometimes we have to lead our feelings, not follow them. The hormones that come with pregnancy can be downright scary. We can feel so unlike ourselves, so "all over the place," so overwhelmed and not even know why. If we don't feel joy right away it doesn't mean we will be bad parents. Finding out you're pregnant can be unnerving, especially under bad circumstances, but the joy will come. And it will go again, but it will return. Pregnancy is a roller coaster of emotions and we just can't give into everything we feel. Not feeling joy or enchantment right away doesn't mean that you won't eventually and it certainly doesn't mean you should have an abortion.

3. The lie: "I can't be a mother right now, I'm not done growing myself." The truth: No, you're not, I'm not. We won't ever be done growing and we should be thankful for that. The ugly truth: You're pregnant, so you ARE a mother. Someone once said that when we have a baby we ourselves are babies as parents and as our child grows so do we. And it's true. Our babies don't come with manuals. We learn as we go, everyday. And everyday we're faced with situations that we don't know what to do with. As a parent, for every thing you do right you'll feel like you did 1,000 things wrong. But, we keep learning and our Father in Heaven keeps lavishing His grace upon us. It'd be nice if we had it all figured out before we actually bring the baby into the world, but it doesn't work like that. You may not feel like a mother right away especially if it's your first pregnancy, but those instincts will kick in. I'm a mom of 3. I've learned and changed a lot since my first child. I'm a very different parent than I was almost 8 years ago, but I still feel like I fail everyday in some aspect of my parenting. That doesn't mean that I need to stop being a mom or get rid of my kids. It means that I do need Him, I do need to ask forgiveness and I do need to try harder everyday. Not much about motherhood is immediate. It's best that we try our hardest to be patient and realize that things come with time.

So, to the girl considering abortion, I'm sorry we live in a society that has allowed this to be an option. I wish we lived in a nation that instead of solving this with the taking of an innocent life we would instead take your hand to pray with you and tell you you can do this instead of ushering you into a cold room and validating your feelings that you can't or shouldn't be a mom. I hope we would rather give you information and support on how to do this because being a mother is a wonderful privilege. But, not one that comes without feelings of uncertainty and struggle. It's a job that The Lord hand picked you to do. The fear and doubt can overcome you, don't let them. Let the fear push you to try harder, not give up. There are people who will walk beside you and encourage you in your job as a mother. Seek out those people, not the ones telling you can't or shouldn't.  I wish I knew you. I'd love to take you for coffee (decaf of course) and let you cry on my shoulder cause I know your emotions are everywhere. I'd love to treat you to a dessert for your growing appetite and I'd love to sit and go over the thousands of WONDERFUL and PRECIOUS promises that the Lord has made in His word for your life and the child that you carry. I'd love to pray those promises over you. So, for now I'm praying for those considering abortion. That He will place people in their lives to speak truth to them and encourage them to trust in His call for motherhood. I'm praying for strength for these moms to make the right decision and not one that will leave them with feelings of hurt and regret. I'm praying that He would change the hearts of those that condone abortion and that He would revive our nation and bring us back to a place where we value life at conception and trust in Him as we shepherd these blessings He's given us in these children. To the mom who thinks that she can't...you can! You stand in a long line with the rest of us that try hard and may you find women to encourage and strengthen you as you walk toward this calling of motherhood.